It’s a hard thing.
Choosing rightly.
A planet of nigh onto 8 billion people, and still the hardest thing in this world… is to choose rightly.
To find the person you fit together with, in something approximating… cohesiveness.
Not perfection.
Not even love.
I’m very non-western and old world when it comes to people being together.
I believe marriage is something fundamental between a man and a woman. Not just fundamental to them, but fundamental to the clan, to the tribe, to a functional society.
I’m not making any stance on this for other people, not throwing stones at alternative lifestyles.
But for my definition, marriage is a simple thing, that binds a complex woman to a complex man.
And when it works it is a rarity.
And when it works it is a wonder.
And I think it would be less rare, a working marriage, if we went into it less programmed by 20th and 21st century obsession with self and things.
Something a young lady once told me.
Odd to find I have not forgotten it.
I think the person who marries only because they are ‘in love’, is like a fool and his money, someone who in the fullness of time will be parted from it.
I believe in lust, I believe lust has gotten more people wed than love, but fine let’s call that chemical high you’re feeling… love. That will fade… that chemical romance, that explosion, that madness… so if that’s the feeling you’re counting on to be your definition of love, and to be there always…then you are someone heading for, like too much of western civilization, disappointment… and divorce.
Love is not the promise of the wedding, it is the dedication to the journey.
It is to take that lust, and that like, and mortar them together with duty, to each other, to those who came before, to those who come after… to the journey.
And it is in walking this journey together, haphazardly at times, inelegantly at times, but ultimately taking that journey together, and helping each other walk it… and it’s in the walking of that journey… walking that journey well… that you can begin to truly speak of love.
Duty and Sacrifice.
Dirty words in the ‘me’ generation. Which no doubt is why bastardry is all the rage. A taboo-less society, and I say this being more sinner than saint, it has been tried before, and it has always failed.
It has always ended in burning Gomorrahs.
The reason is simple, the only things that ever endure in this world, do so because of men and women who believe in duty and sacrifice. Even above their personal needs or desires or whims.
And a nation devoid of such people, is a nation on the road to being unmade.
I have no real idea where all that came from. Save perhaps as someone who has loved, neither well nor wisely, finding myself for whatever reason tonight… looking closely at the mistakes, and seeing something I had quietly overlooked…. the miracles.
Odd bit of blather to be going on about, I grant ya.
Aye, but what’s a blog for, if not to ramble incoherently and occasionally… about the journey. 🙂
God, whatever God you bend your knee to, keep you all safe.